Is Fear Stopping You?
I understand how it feels to doubt who you are and feel crippling fear even when you have achieved success. I have co-owned multiple seven-figure enterprises, and my book Meant for More is a bestseller on Amazon, yet I have struggled on many occasions during my life. Imposter syndrome can make you doubt your own success or leave you feeling unworthy of success, which ends up costing you real joy and fulfillment. Is that fear stopping you from saying yes to that marketing plan, reaching out to get bigger clients, or simply enjoying the success you have?
How often do you wonder why or how you have managed the attainment of wealth, business growth, academic accolade, or respect from your peers? You know how to do it but it doesn’t matter how many self-help books you read or webinars you attend about self-growth, the fear persists. You have tried all of the techniques, you write down your accomplishments, and celebrate your wins, yet the feeling of being a fraud persists. You question why you feel this way. I get it, you’re thinking “surely if I am truly worthy of my accomplishments, I would know how to conquer my fear?”. It makes you furious, it’s infuriating and yet the fear of getting it wrong fuels your anxiety that maybe you won’t be good enough and you will be “found out.” You can’t help but wonder if what you have achieved has all been about luck or your ability to “fake it” rather than “be it.” I have been where you are, exhausted from trying so hard, always feeling like I needed to prove myself and I knew I needed to find another way to deal with fear. But I had no idea how to become my most powerful self and live free from self-doubt. So how did I reprogram my subconscious mind, overcome my inner fear and start living a life I love?
Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women
Let me start by reassuring you that almost everyone has struggled with imposter syndrome and the crippling fear, that they are not worthy of the life they have created. Imposter phenomenon in high achieving women tends to affect high achievers, including doctors, lawyers, academics, and even celebrities, who don’t understand the difference between danger and fear. Women often struggle more with imposter syndrome, which is not surprising. Our culture has taught us that being a woman is a disadvantage, and women should not be as ambitious as men. Consequently, women are impacted to a greater degree by past trauma, which remerges when they achieve success. This is the cause of the fear that prevents growth and finding a sense of true purpose.
What you may not realize is that imposter syndrome in business is an emotional reaction that triggers feelings of fear. Maybe the time you were berated for a mistake or told to keep quiet as a child. This made you take a step back and now you are in a loop, constantly on the edge, you know you have wings and you want to fly, but you just can’t take the leap.
Unless you recognize your emotional guidance system forms an integral part of the structure that helps you to know what to do. In other words, your inner guidance that keeps your actions in alignment with your thoughts and what you want, you will stay stuck despite all of your accomplishments. Imposter syndrome is simply a fear that comes from an experience that made you believe that you are not capable or worthy of your success. Fear is a result of your own ego, trying to protect you from danger, a threat you anticipate, a danger that is not real! When you learn how to identify if the danger is real or if the fear you are feeling, is a result of a perceived threat you can change your perspective. The impostor experience comes from a persistent internalized fear that comes from your Original Core Trauma™. The event or experience that created the trauma that shifted your perceptions, resulted in false beliefs about your abilities and how the world around you works.
Why You Fear Success
Fear of success is often the reason used to explain imposter syndrome. Here’s the truth, I will tell you, as someone who grew up poor. When you understand the truth of how we function in reality, you will comprehend why you feel like you’re inadequate and worry about failing.
The more awakened you become, the less you fear and your Original Core Trauma™ will lose its power over your emotions and actions in the present. The reality is we get caught between past trauma and the perception that was created about ourselves, others, and the behaviors and actions that are creating results in the present. When you know how to align your actions with your emotions you will access real power.
How to Become Your Most Powerful Self
When you recall past trauma (which isn’t as radical as it may sound), you get pulled out of the present moment. You effectively shift reality and ignite the fear you felt when something happened, which made you think somehow you were not enough. This can happen at any moment when you find yourself hesitant or skeptical about why you are a success. Here are just a handful of things I used to question about myself.
- Maybe my business is a success because of what other people have contributed?
- The publisher made a mistake when they accepted my book?
- Without my partner, I would never have bought my house?
When you learn to operate at a higher state of consciousness you stop self-sabotage and know your worth. Perceived dangers of not knowing enough or doing it well enough will vanish. The doubt of your abilities, intellect, and decisions and the fraudulent feelings will lose their power over your actions.
The Secret to Becoming All You Are Meant to Be
Consciously awakening means understanding your perceptions create your reality, and they are a construction of worrying about who you think you will disappoint and what other people will think of you, whether you fail or succeed. Letting go of the biggest misunderstanding/misconception, that it took the actions of others or events outside of your control to become who you are. This is not about the management of your thoughts, this is about becoming aligned with your authentic self and releasing a need or belief that you must please others and meet their expectations. This desire for control which makes you feel like a fraud is based on a perception of linear time. You imagine danger, fear failure, and stop being conscious of the power of your true self in the present moment. Linear time is an artificial human construct, and many top physicists propose that time is an illusion and our brains construct a sense of time as if it is moving forward.
Our minds add a “subjective ingredient” to reality, “so that we are projecting onto the world the temporal perspective that we have as agents [in this environment]. Alan Alda Asks: ‘What Is Time?’
The truth is the only reality is the moment you exist in now. When we recall a past event, we experience that moment and time seems linear. The more you try to control past and future experiences, the worse the feeling of being an imposter becomes. When you question your abilities or success based on past trauma, you project images into now. The harder you try to figure out why you feel like a fraud, the more you diminish the present instead of awakening to how life really works.
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